Runner Wins Nobel Prize After Accidentally Inspiring Billions

When Isla Brinthoffa loaded up, searched for an inspirational picture, and tapped in the simple message “Running taught me that I am capable of so much more than I ever imagined,” she thought of the joy that it would spread among her 33 Facebook followers and 15 Instagrams. But little did she know, the world was waiting.

The digital marketing boffins at got wind of Brinthoffa’s strong humanitarian piece, and instantly forwarded it to their 40K followers, which included, who forwarded to their 330K followers. Incredibly, this included nu-folk singer Jade Mullhingy, who saw the message and, same day, went on stage at the Rosebowl Stadium in Tennessee, Illinois, and not only told her audience about Brinthoffa and her magical words, but dedicated her new song “A random runner taught me that I am capable of so much more than I ever imagined” to the otherwise quite plain runner. Mullhingy’s audience of more than 80,000 recorded the song on their smartphones, and each sent it to Facebook, reaching an unbelievable 80,000 x 250-odd people, which is a really massive number. It’s estimated that around 96% of the world’s population have now been inspired by Brinthoffa’s words to get off their fat asses and run.

“When I saw the meme I just had to go run,” gushed Andrea Testaban. “And I’m not even a runner! In fact, my job defusing mines in Afghanistan ordinarily precludes it. But, my boss – initially horrified by the idea – saw the meme and relaxed, and let me go.” Testaban, speaking from her hospital bed, continued, “The OP should win some award for this, or something.”

The first male and first female (Brinthoffa) are crowned at the lavish Nobel ceremony.
The first male and first female (Brinthoffa) are crowned at the lavish Nobel ceremony.

And Testaban’s wish was granted, when Don Yuhan, president of the Nobel Association, saw the action unfolding via his smartphone, while in the bath. “I saw the message, and I felt inspired to go run. My wife tried to stop me as I had no time to grab clothes, and this is a nice neighbourhood, but I was an unstoppable force. Naked as the day I was born, I ran down the drive and into the street, singing the song and inspiring others. So awesome was I, in fact, that many children and old people had to shield their eyes.”

Immediately he returned from the police station, Yuhan penned an email to his staff, and history was written. Isla Brinthoffa was last night crowned with the Nobel prize, in a glittering ceremony. During the show Brinthoffa was treated to other memes that were inspired by her own. “Run, walk, or crawl, just do what you can to get to the finish” was one; another, “It’s sunrises like this that make me feel alive,” and “Every journey begins with the first step.” Children from 192 countries each brought along crayoned memes in their own languages, which we imagine were unbelievably inspiring.

So, next time you tap a simple message into Facebook or other social media, just think of what happened here to the otherwise ordinary Isla Brinthoffa: the keyboard really is mightier than the sword.

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